The world is a wild place.
We live in a culture that talks a big game about getting along and being kind to one another, but then you go on social media, and all of a sudden, it’s the wild, wild west when it comes to belief systems. I’m going to be real here: the internet is not helping connect people. What it typically ends up doing is creating echo chambers for any and all belief systems or ideologies. You can find a Facebook group for pretty much anyone in the world. If you believe in something, chances are there is a social media support group for it. Now, that’s not a bad thing whatsoever. There are times and places when those groups are very helpful and sometimes needed. But sometimes what happens is that we get so hyper-focused on the group or the idea that we lose sight of the reality that people are all different.
I am a Baptist pastor who has many different friends. I have some friends who are Baptist, Wesleyan, Presbyterian, Catholic, Calvinist, Arminian, and even a Mormon and an atheist friend. This does not make me inconsistent. It makes me human.
There is a Baptist joke that goes around often: "If you get two Baptists in a room together, you’ll get four opinions." It’s funny because it has an element of truth to it. Somewhere along the line, though, we’ve lost the ability and the common courtesy to be civil with one another. The internet has given us the ability to take jabs without really facing any consequences. If you were on the playground and you took a jab at someone over something, there was a good chance someone was going to get punched. Actions had consequences. We’ve lost that in our modern era.
Here’s the thing, though: if you sat most people down over dinner or coffee, there would not be jabs. If you had to look someone in the eye and talk something out, the majority of the time, there would be kindness and care taken over whatever subject matter was being discussed. I’ve been in in-person meetings where the subject matter was somewhat tense, and I’ve been in online chat rooms where similar subjects were tense. However, with the ability to hide in a dark room behind a screen and keyboard, something happens. We feel superhuman. We have information at our fingertips that we can Google to defend our ground, and all of a sudden, human decency goes out the window. There is an emotional surge of power that runs through our veins when we feel like we’re winning an argument, and sometimes that power can blunt our rational thinking. Because there is often an aftermath to our words.
In fact, God’s word tells us that there are consequences to our words. Proverbs 18:21 says, “The tongue can bring death or life; those who love to talk will reap the consequences.”
What we say can and will either bring life or death to a situation and to people. How we communicate matters. How we treat one another matters too.
Now, I’m not saying we have to back down from our convictions. I’m not saying we have to capitulate on something we don’t agree with or believe in, but how you handle the circumstance is going to speak volumes about you as a person.
I can have dinner with someone that I don’t fully agree with. I can have a civil conversation with someone who has a different worldview than I do, and that does not mean I’ve caved on my convictions about sin, the Bible, God, humanity, the world, the culture, or the church. What it means is that I’m willing to show grace.
Take a look at 1 Corinthians 8:1-2: “Now regarding your question about food that has been offered to idols. Yes, we know that ‘we all have knowledge’ about this issue. But while knowledge makes us feel important, it is love that strengthens the church. Anyone who claims to know all the answers doesn’t really know very much.”
Knowledge can get us into a puffed-up Ivy League/country club mindset, but understanding that all of us as human beings are flawed and sinful and in need of grace will start to help us see each other in a different light.
Jesus said in John 13:34, “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another.”
What would it look like if, rather than being quick to jump on the comment section of a social media post, we picked up the phone and made a call to have a conversation and try to understand someone’s position? What would it look like if we took time to have dinner or coffee with someone we didn’t agree with?
I think we’d see much less strife and a whole lot more reconciliation.
I think life would be better this way.
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